My First Authentic Halloween Experience

Tonight will be my first taste of Halloween. American style.

You guys over here take ‘All Hallows’ Eve’ to a whole different level compared to us Brits, and well, everyone else in the world.

Back home, if you had the balls to knock on someone’s door and ask for/demand candy, you would be applauded for your audacity.

Why? Because it’s more than likely that the police would be called. Or you’d get told to ‘eff off’.

The Halloween culture just doesn’t exist. It’s primarily seen as ‘something the Americans go crazy for’. But as yet, it hasn’t properly infiltrated British shores.

Yes, there are Halloween parties for students and the odd ‘upper class’ neighborhood will stage an unconventional ‘trick or treating’ scene, but it’s certainly a minority.

Instead, we go nuts for a holiday that takes place just a few days later.

Strap yourself in folks, here comes a history lesson.

November 5th – Guy Fawkes Night aka Bonfire Night.

Back in 1605, a cheeky chappy called Guy Fawkes was part of a gunpowder plot. He was guarding explosives that were designed to blow up the House of Lords and the King at the time.

The plot failed and as a result, this night represents that significance. People and children as young as 4 or 5 create effigies of Guy Fawkes and burn them on a bonfire.

Following that, there would be hundreds of fireworks set off. It’s pretty cool, but you usually freeze your arse off as it’s bloody cold.

This will be the first year in as long as I can remember that I won’t attend a Guy Fawkes night.

So, Halloween.. you better deliver.

It’s been interesting so far. I walked around the campus earlier and saw about eight Scooby Do’s. I wonder why…

In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if Northgate is a sea of Scooby Do’s this evening. People, please remember that Reveille is still and always will be top dog.

Likewise, I dread to think how many people are going out for the sole purpose of finding Johnny Manziel and harassing him all night. Leave him alone! (PS. if you find out his whereabouts, CONTACT ME).

Pumpkins intrigue me. For the record, I’m not entirely sure whether a pumpkin is a fruit or vegetable. We don’t see many in England. Well we may do, but I’ve never considered anything orange as particularly appetizing, so it’s likely that if they are in supermarkets back home, I choose to ignore them.

I’d guess they were a fruit though.

Furthermore, I’d love to know how many pumpkins are eaten outside of Halloween season. My guess? Not many.

So, what am I dressing up as? Well, I originally wanted to go as Kenny Powers from Eastbound and Down, but the person at the Halloween shop looked at me like I was crazy for asking if they had any stuff to do with him. Ballbags.

That left me with no option but to go as an English soccer hooligan. It takes minimal effort. All I have to do is wear an England shirt and get arrested.

See you later, College Station Police Department.

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